Thursday, June 18, 2009 we knew that going on a vacation was would be a little tricky with bailey. everything is, though. when one is physically and mentally challenged, the easy things are not.......easy. we knew there would be lots of walking (up & down hill), it would be hot and sunny (not good for someone who burns easily), the days would be long, crowds would abound, no naptime would be available, and so on. but we have lived with these challenges everyday for the past 7 1/2 years...vacation only multiplies them.

thanks to grandparents, we were able to go on rides with shelby & brody...had we been alone, one parent would have had to sit out with bailey while the other went on ride patrol. it was such a blessing to have them with us to help out with bailey. we decided to rent a double stroller to wheel her around in. (not meant for a 7 yr old, but we had to improvise) just getting her into it was a sight to see. it took me and michael picking her up on either side while nana held the stroller still. even then, she doesn't understand 'bend your legs' or 'scoot back some', everything has to be done by us.

she is so helpless at times. as i was watching her the last day....(nana & peepaw were already gone...therefore i was that parent on watching bailey while michael was on ride patrol)....i couldn't help but notice how in her own world she was. here we are in an amazing amusement park. there are rides everywhere, junkfood galore, kids running around having the time of their lives.....and here sits bailey in the double stroller with her deck of cards and a piece of juicy fruit. she is content to shuffle the numbers right off those cards, never batting an eye at the laughter of others or the screams from the children on the rides. she sits there all alone, it seems, in her own little world. who knows what she is thinking or how she really feels or if she even comprehends where we are.

how i long for her to talk to me. if i could have one wish, it would be to hear bailey speak. not just mumble in 'baby talk' consonant sounds, but to really speak with words. i would be so excited to hear her tell me what she wants to drink....ya know, i thought about that, too. she never gets to decide what she wants us to order her at a restaurant or to give her at home. i mean, we always order sprite for her, but what if she really wanted sweet tea or just water...the poor thing cannot even tell me that. she just accepts what is given to her.

i really do just sit around sometimes and wonder what's going on in that mind of hers. i cannot wait for her to get to heaven....she will be given a new mind, a perfect mind...and i have no idea (and if you'll be honest, neither do you) what heaven will really be like, but i cannot help but to get excited about the thought of her running up to me and talking up a storm. i want to just sit and talk to her for a while. yes, i am fully aware that once in heaven we will be praising God, but i sure hope that He gives me just 5 minutes alone with my daughter to hear her talk to her mom!


Anonymous said...

That's a great thought but I'm praying for that a little earlier. Love ya Mrs. Wiggins.